Bloody Brazilians

I've hinted before about the Brazilian love-gone-wrong saga. Let's pretend you bought me those Bulmers and now I'm all chatty...

In a nutshell met a Brazilian bloke in Portugal when I was there in Feb 2005. We chatted all night, made out, exhanged phone numbers, I thought that was it. No - he txtd me and kept going on about how he'd never met a girl like me before and hoped I would come back to Lagos soon. Given he looked like this:

And Lagos looks like this:

and RyanAir would fly me there for 20 quid, well, I went back for another week.

That week turned into a month. I left to do some more travelling with my old flatmate from Dublin, Swedish Rebecca, and meet up with my beautiful friend Gosia in Prague, but he wanted me to come back again and so proposed over the phone. After a week or so I said yes, moved back to Lagos that May and we lived together for a year. My folks came to visit, loved Marcio, and we applied for his visa for Australia and planned our wedding for August 2006. He went home to Brazil at Christmas, I went to visit friends in the UK as we couldn't afford for us both to fly to Brazil. Anyways, after a year of essentially being a housewife I was officially going doolally, and said I wanted to head home to Oz, get a job and set up house and plan our wedding. He agreed, and I left Portugal in April 2006. Found a wedding dress in London on the way home to Melbourne, bought it. THREE HOURS after I bought the dress and was feeling all happy and in love, I got a call from Marcio to say I probably shouldn't have just bought that wedding dress as he was no longer coming to Australia - he'd had a one night stand when he was home in Brazil and the girl had just shown up at his Mum's place claiming to be pregnant with his baby. Can you imagine how delighted I was? Went through a few months of hell going back and forth about reconciling but in the end he chickened out and went home to Brazil, where he's now living with the 19-year-old slapper he'd got off with and the baby that was born waaaay to early to be his! Fun tale, donchya think? One for the grandkids, for sure.

I'm now as over it as you can be with these things, permanent scars to the heart and all that. I am, however, grateful I found out about his inability to keep his dick in his pants before we got married and had the babies he was forever nagging me to make with him. I've picked up the pieces and am happily getting on with my life: great job, new place, amazing friends and life here in Oz. However, there is still residual resenment towards Brazil and one Brazilian in particular, hence me fugging this couch:

It's of Brazilian design and leather. And it's fugly.

And you didn't even have to cough up for those Bulmers!